Do you believe in fate?
When it comes to Nancy and Lois Brown, it’s hard to deny that these two women were meant to meet. Born hundreds of miles apart and leading two very different lives, Nancy and Lois’ paths didn’t cross until later in life – but they believe it all happened for a reason…… Nancy was born, raised, and educated in Jackson, Mississippi. As a young girl she aspired to be a marine biologist but came to realize that might not be the best choice for someone who couldn’t swim. She then set her sights on becoming a park ranger, but at the time only men could occupy those roles. After graduating from Millsaps College in Jackson, Nancy settled on a career as a lab technician.
In 1962, Nancy moved to Washington D.C. and went to work for the National Institute of Health at the National Cancer Institute. Nancy spent 18 years doing basic research in cancer and AIDS. She took graduate courses in microbiology at the University of Maryland and later received her Master of Public Administration from American University and moved into science management at the NIH.
A mere 1,200 miles away in the Bronx lived Lois. She, like Nancy, spent her childhood dreaming of what she wanted to be when she grew up. Lois wanted to be a rabbi or a doctor, but went on to find out only men could hold those positions at the time. She attended Hunter College for a year and a half but dropped out and got married at 17 years old. Four years later Lois had her daughter and was separated from her husband the following year. Faced with having to support herself and her daughter, she knew she needed to find a way to build a career.
Lois never forgot her dream of wanting to be a doctor, and although she couldn’t become one, she could become a nurse. Shortly after obtaining her RN, Lois packed up her daughter and relocated to Houston where she worked for 5 years doing cancer research and psychiatry. After remarrying, Lois and her new husband moved to Washington D.C. and she began working at the National Institute of Health where Nancy also worked. Though they were within reach of one another, destiny wouldn’t bring them together just yet.
Once she realized that there was a ceiling to how high she could advance in the nursing field, Lois decided she would be happiest changing careers. Following her separation from her 2nd husband, Lois went back to school full time and got her degree in civil engineering from the University of Maryland. At the age of 36 Lois started over and began working at Verizon as an environmental engineer where she would stay until she retired.
Now that both women were back living in Washington D.C., it was only a matter of time before their path’s would finally cross. Nancy, who had retired in 1994, began hosting cultural “salons” in her home on a monthly basis. She and her social group would invite accomplished individuals to come and speak about music, art and literature. As fate would have it, at one of the monthly meetings in 1997, Nancy and Lois finally met and the two instantly hit it off. This wasn’t the first lesbian relationship for either of the women, but in a time when same sex marriage was not yet legal, it wasn’t always easy to be open about their relationship. Nancy chuckles recalling, “my father would be rolling over in his grave if he knew that I gave Lois my mother’s engagement ring.”
The couple moved to Maine in 2004, where a registered partnerships bill had recently been passed for same sex couples. Lois retired in 2007 and the pair spent the next 13 years in Maine enjoying time together and eventually getting married in 2013. The two had built a wonderful life for themselves. They purchased a home in Florida in order to avoid the harsh Maine winters, but after a few years they knew they needed to come up with a new plan. Neither Nancy nor Lois loved Florida enough to continue going back and forth so they sold their southern winter retreat and decided to go back to the place they both considered “home”, Washington D.C.
Nancy and Lois were apprehensive at the thought of looking for a community where they could comfortably retire. “All gay people fear for when they get older. It’s a real issue in the LGBTQ community and has been one for ages,” Nancy says. “Couples want to know they will be welcome and can stay in the same rooms and be taken care of together.”
After spending time looking at communities on the east coast, Collington was the safe haven they had been seeking. The couple was completely impressed by the variety of people they met upon moving in in 2017. “All were welcomed and we were welcomed. We felt very welcome as a lesbian couple,” claimed Lois. The happiness and excitement the women felt upon arrival has remained the same over the last 2 years. They immediately found their place, what they loved to do, and felt right at home.
